Ignorance is not bliss...

I bought a puppy yesterday. She is an English Bulldog. Her name is Edith. She's quiet fiesty. But I think that is the young puppy in her. I hope and have read on blogs and in books that puppies are all kind of rambuncious, but later calm down. Or at least some breeds. But that's not the point of this post. My friend Sarah went with me to the nearby city to buy her. I was telling her about the Cesar Millan "How to raise the perfect dog: from puppyhood and beyond." I told her about how the book tells people to have CALM-ASSERTIVE ENERGY. Dogs don't understand human language. So, when you say, "No," "Stop," or something to that effect, they just don't get it. A mother dog uses her attitude and energy to teach her young pups the do's and don'ts of life. So, we should to.

Several times in the book, he says you should NEVER hit a dog. He talked about how people's instinct or reaction is spanking a dog for bad behavior. But it's better to reward and praise good behavior. I told her about how I've seen people do most of the bad things Cesar says not to do in America. And I've seen people do them here in Asia. Sometimes, we just let the anger get the best of us. Or maybe the worst. I love Sarah so much. I can ask her any question and she doesn't tell me the cover-up answer to make her country look and sound better, but tells me the truth. And she's not offended when I make observations and helps me learn so much about how people think here. So, I asked her about hitting as discipline for children in Asia. She told me there is an old proverb about how if you don't hit your child, his faults are your responsibility. She explained that with boys especially this thought is strong. Don't get me wrong, if I ever become a parent, I think spanking will be on the list of disciplinary actions. BUT spanking is a scary possibility in the hands of broken people. There might be a language barrier, but the word Asians use to describe what their mother and father did when they were younger is "beat." Maybe there is no word for spanking. But it just breaks my heart to think of what happens behind closed doors. She told me it's very possible that most children in Asia are being beaten. In the West, I think we have come to understand spanking is not always the best option. There SHOULD be discipline, so I'm not saying let your kid run wild. But if that doesn't work, try something else. Sarah told me, that most Asian parents will just keep going with the same old thing because it's what they know. I don't care what you say or think, I truely believe that abuse will have an effect on who you are. Yes, I know you can make lemons into lemonade. But lemonade is sour and so tart sometimes...I wish they knew what kind of effect this has on their kids later in life. Sarah also told me about her friend who has a sister who is now a lesbian. The mother of these two girls beat them pretty badly when they were young. Sarah thought that the sister that chose the homosexual lifestyle chose it because she admired her father. Her father was a sweet, kind man. She desired to be like him. To be the protector in the relationship and she had no desire to be like her mother. I'm not saying this is true for every case. But I hope and pray, the people here will see that their actions have consequences...